hell of a party

[middlingalong]

Ivan must be drunker than he thought he was. He could have sworn he knew his way around Vivienne's parents' house, since she wanted to introduce him last week and showed him the place, but maybe they have a... secret... upstairs... bar? where Vivienne's room is supposed to be? And most certainly was last time he checked? He's never going to find the sweater she sent him up looking for here, anyway. Why is there a secret upstairs bar in Vivienne's parents' house?

Comments

[warpfairy]

"And I'm supposed to start doing notebooks things when I'm six?"

"That's when I started. You can start earlier if you like; Linyabel did."

[isthisart]

"Some of it depends on being able to write pretty fast, though."

[thisvorlunatic]

"Hey," says Little Miles suddenly. "I get a magic dwarf alt, right?"

"Sort of, yes..."

"And Nika gets a magic alien alt?"

"Arguably."

"Why doesn't Ivan get any magic alts?"

"Because he's Ivan," suggests Grownup Miles.

SPOILERS FOR EFFULGENCE: SUPERLUMINAL FOLLOW

[isthisart]

"But that's not fair," objects Nika. "And he also only gets one grownup and me and Miles have two. There should be a magic Ivan. Baaaar, make the door give us a not a boring human Ivan so it's fair."

I don't control the door, but your Ivan is already not a human.

Nika blinks at this napkin.

"Ivaaan," she says, "you didn't tell me you weren't a human."

[middlingalong]

"What?" say both Ivans at once.

"I'm a human! Look at me, I'm totally a human," continues Tiny Ivan. "I don't even have elf ears or anything."

[thisvorlunatic]

"Looks aren't everything," mutters Grownup Miles.

"Ivan's not a human?" says Little Miles. "What is he instead?"

[middlingalong]

"I'm a human!" exclaims Tiny Ivan. "I'm not any other thing! I'm just me!"

It's not entirely clear that he'd like me to tell you, says Bar.

[isthisart]

"Oh dear," murmurs Linya.

"Bar won't tell us what Ivan is unless Ivan lets her!" says Nika, indignantly interpreting the napkin. "Ivaaaaan! Come on!"

[middlingalong]

Tiny Ivan crosses his arms. His alt sighs and ruffles his hair.

[thisvorlunatic]

"Won't you even tell Ivan what he is?" demands Little Miles. "He doesn't know! It's not fair if you know what species somebody is and you won't tell them just 'cause they didn't know already!"

(Grownup Miles is impressed with his younger self's craftiness. That is some well-targeted outrage right there.)

[middlingalong]

If Ivan asks me certainly I will tell him what he is, Bar says.

Tiny Ivan declines to ask. He continues folding his arms and pouting. And getting scritched by his alt.

[warpfairy]

"She says if Ivan asks her himself she'll tell," Isabella relays.

[washed_in_blood]

"Bring me over there," says Little Miles to Bothari.

Bothari picks him up and brings him over to the bar and holds him where he could see any napkins that appeared at him.

"Are you hiding more weird stuff?" says Little Miles, scowling at Bar.

[alicornucopia]

There is a pause, and then Bar says,

You're a unicorn.

Nika yelps, possibly in a pleased manner.

[washed_in_blood]

...Bothari leans back slightly to give Little Miles a dubious look, but doesn't drop him or make alarmed sounds or anything.

"How am I a unicorn?" asks Little Miles. "I'm not even like a unicorn! Not even a little bit!"

[alicornucopia]

You are currently in human form, but your underlying species absent your transformative illusion is a unicorn.

"Am I a thing?" Nika demands.

Yes. You're a dragon.

"I'm a dragon!" crows Nika. "Come on, Ivan, find out what you are!"

Ivan debates with himself, then shuffles over to the bar and says, "What?"

Firebird, diagnoses the bar.

"Okay, so how do we get rid of our transform illusions?" asks Nika, clapping her hands.

That requires the application of magic objects I am unable to dispense.

"...Oh."

[washed_in_blood]

"Well do you know where we can get them?" asks Little Miles. "Can you give us how to make them even if you can't make them for us?"

"M'lord..." murmurs Bothari.

"I wanna be a unicorn," says Little Miles. "...But only if I could turn back, though. I could turn back, right?"

[alicornucopia]

If you retained possession of the magic object, yes. There are books on how to make such things.

"Magic books! I want all the magic books!" says Nika.

"Why," says Tiny Ivan, "are we things?"

I can't identify where you got it from without your biological parents present.

"...My birth parents are dragons?" concludes Nika.

At least one of them is or was, assuming nothing unusual is going on.

"...Da or Mama is a unicorn?"

Presumably.

[washed_in_blood]

"That's a lot of people who are stuff," says Little Miles. "...Is Bothari stuff? You don't have to look if you don't want to, Bothari. I won't yell about it or anything."

Bothari grunts noncommittally.

[alicornucopia]

The bar declines to produce an identification of Bothari on the basis of a noncommittal grunt.

[washed_in_blood]

"You have to say she can tell or she won't," says Little Miles.

Bothari frowns slightly. "You can say. Ma'am."

[alicornucopia]

He's a bugbear, napkins the bar, possibly grudging.

"I don't even know what that is," says Nika.

[washed_in_blood]

"Me either," says Little Miles. He looks up to verify that Bothari has looked, and asks, "Do you know?"

Bothari shakes his head.

"What is it, then?" asks Little Miles.

[alicornucopia]

The bar produces a book with a photograph on the cover, entitled A History of Bugbears (by M. E. Knight, published by the Drakontos Press Escobar).

[washed_in_blood]

"And it's the same thing," says Little Miles, "with the magic transform thingy that you can't give us and all? Is everybody from our world stuff?"

Bothari looks at the picture.