trade my soul for a wish

[from_scratch]

This is a successor to "call me maybe", which is getting crowded.

Cam is dipping a grilled cheese sandwich into a bowl of tomato soup when he feels the summons. He goes ahead and grabs it. Doesn't even drop the sandwich.


with Mark (kappa)

with Adanya (Aestrix)

with Sable (kappa)

with Ari (andaisq)

with Metella (kappa)

with Miles (kappa)

with Isabella (Eva)

with Steel (Rockeye)

with Daphne (Maggie)

with Edie (Maggie)

Comments

[from_scratch]

"That sounds very inconvenient. If it turns out that summonings and dismissals from here work the same as those from the usual destination, an angel may be able to help you with that, although it'd be tremendously complicated and delicate. If it doesn't work the same, I might be stuck here forever, or you might not be able to get anyone else, or - something else may be in effect, I don't know."

[kaolinandbone]

"I've gotten used to my body by now, to be honest: it turns out that when you spend eighty years looking the same, you tend to start associating that with your self-image."

She shrugs.

"In any case, I'm glad to hear that I now have a decent alternative to going insane in another century or so."

[from_scratch]

"...Why would you go insane?"

[kaolinandbone]

"It's a side-effect of my particular brand of immortality. Instead of dying from old age, you get about two centuries at the outside before your mind goes. No-one knows why, to my knowledge."

[from_scratch]

"Well, that's a raw deal. I can't guarantee you wouldn't keep it if you turned into a daeva, though, there's no precedent for daevahood interacting with magic."

[kaolinandbone]

"Well, it's certainly better than being assured of going mad. But let's put this depressing topic aside: you must have other questions."

[from_scratch]

"Loads, but I'm not sure where to start; this possibility hasn't actually occurred to me before. List some social problems?"

[kaolinandbone]

"The social problems are magical and terrible, both. Give me a moment to get my thoughts in order."

She lets out a small breath.

"Alright. As far as this castle can be said to have a real location, it exists in Shadescast, which is a vampire city. I am a vampire. Vampires are hated almost everywhere else in the world, for good reasons: the vast majority of vampire culture sees humans as little more than slaves, chattel, and food. This is a result of a bad power structure, which has been further corrupted by horrible and or insane people in power. Vampires need to feed on blood from humans every month or so on average, requiring no other sustenance: animal blood doesn't work, it has to be blood from a thinking organism. Side-effects of chronic or acute exposure to vampire feeding include short or long-term memory loss, fugue states, and catatonia. Given vampire attitudes towards humans, few of them are careful."

[from_scratch]

"Well, that's terrible. How safe is this to experiment with? If I make you some blood, and it turns out that pins all the side effects on me, what am I looking at?"

[kaolinandbone]

"I am careful. I feed rarely and lightly, and have had eighty years of practice. Even if I were to inflict side-effects on you, I would be highly unlikely to do anything worse than cause you to lose the last thirty seconds of your memory."

She smiles, showing her fangs now.

"Would you care to try the experiment?"

[from_scratch]

"Maybe. One sec." He makes a black stick-shaped device, and without appearing to manipulate it in any way, sets it up to reflect the immediate surroundings. "Marker," he says to it. "Recording a test of offering this vampire here half a cup of blood designed to be from the hypothetical offspring of, oh, let's say C.S. Lewis and Joan of Arc, I think I can be tolerably sure they have never actually reproduced." He looks at Isabella. "How do you take it? Teacup? Straw? Aerosol?"

[kaolinandbone]

"Teacup. The fangs are instinctual and unnecessary. As far as I can tell from biological study, Vampires don't actually digest blood; we must gain nutrition from it in some other way, but..." She shrugs.

[from_scratch]

Cam makes a prettily patterned little teacup. He thinks for a moment, and it fills with blood, and then he hands it over.

[kaolinandbone]

The vampiress takes a sip, and then a swallow. She looks up with a puzzled look on her face.

"You're certain that this is blood? It's absolutely tasteless."

[from_scratch]

"Yep, it's blood, but it's from a person who doesn't exist. They could've, but do not. Okay, I'll try some of what would have been mine back when I ran on biology." He makes another, matching teacup, puts a dram of blood in that one too, and offers it, crossing his fingers.

[kaolinandbone]

Lioncourt takes the teacup, and raises it to her lips.

She swallows.

"Equally tasteless. It's odd: animal blood is violently repellent to vampires. Human blood tastes vaguely sweet, with variations by person. This... is neither."

[from_scratch]

"Okay. ...I'm going to give you a quantity of blood belonging to a real person who is dead who has spent no time as a daeva. But they were a total jerk so I don't mind mildly inconveniencing them for science." One teacup of Hitler blood.

[kaolinandbone]

This teacup is likewise tasteless. Isabella frowns.

"Could it be that created blood doesn't work for some reason?"

[from_scratch]

"Yeah, looks like it. There goes the cunning application of demonic power to the problem of blood supply. Damn."

[kaolinandbone]

"Perhaps it's somehow related to the fact that if you feed off someone until they go catatonic, you stop being able to draw sustenance from them, even if they still have blood left. I haven't done this experiment myself for obvious reasons, but I have confirmation from multiple vaguely trustworthy sources."

[from_scratch]

"I could try a live person." Cup of the blood of an asshole serial killer currently imprisoned on the Moon?

[kaolinandbone]

Isabella takes a sip, then swallows and shakes her head.

"No, still nothing."

[from_scratch]

"Okay, I'm out of ideas for categories of demonically created blood. I guess I could do angel or fairy but I can't think of a principled reason for them to be different from demon blood." Cam picks up his device again. The reflection of their surroundings winks out. A few lines of text in a language Isabella won't recognize appear in its place, and then they too disappear.

[kaolinandbone]

"... There is one more thing we could try, from a scientific perspective. Would you be willing to let me bite you? It could be that it's blood from people from your world that doesn't work."

[from_scratch]

"I mean, if that's your hypothesis, name someone from here and I'll make a cup of their blood," suggests Cam. "Biting me won't scale unless I turn out to be totally immune to the side effects and want to spend most of my time getting bit."