if i were yours

[floofcoaster]

Behold the wolf in his unnatural habitat, eating the foods of his people in traditional quantities, his typical companion away in the distant land of The Bathroom.

That is to say, Zeus is in Milliways with one and a half heavily topped pizzas, waiting for Harley and Andrea to come back.

Comments

[aeskhyne]

"I dunno, it was obvious to me," he shrugs. "Anyway, those are kind of trivial, the big one is minting and you'd get way less use out of that than me. You can have it anyway if you want, it's just a hex, hexes are cheap." He fans out a progression of coins in his hand, from triangle up to seven-pointed star, all made of what looks like clear glass veined with thick twisting streaks of colour. The streaks move, slowly but visibly. "Arbitrary magic fueled by pain. You touch a coin and make a wish and if it's a big enough coin and it's not a specifically impossible wish, wish comes true. Anybody can wish on 'em but only mints can make 'em. These are all mine."

[instar]

Bella looks at these coins.



"Can they by any chance pause time everywhere but here so you can explain this to me and I can think without large quantities of awful things happening elsewhwere while we do that?"

[aeskhyne]

"Don't see why not."

He disappears the coins.

"There. Took a hex."

[instar]

Bella looks out the window.

Bella sits down.

"What happened?"

[aeskhyne]

"I was in one of my human morphs - this one," he flickers briefly into the appropriate shape to demonstrate, "and I walked into the library and instead of the library there was this bar. Cute guy sitting at the bar with a ton of pizzas told me it was interdimensional, we got to talking, I said my name was Ophelia, he's Zeus apparently, and also apparently his boyfriend is a - what was it he said, something like 'pansexual masochistic snuggle-fiend with a shitty home life', anyway there's like twenty of me and we're collectively called Jokers. I'm also pretty damn sure there's a bunch of you, but I only met the one, and I don't have a way to verify those. The Jokers all telepathically dumped their life histories on me, I gave back something heavy on the childhood trauma and light on the identifying details, I'm pretty convinced about them, but I don't think the same solution exactly applies when it's you."

[instar]

"I want to meet the bunch of me."

[aeskhyne]

"Okay. I'll - hm. Do you still care about secrecy, should we meet 'em somewhere that's not your house?"

[instar]

"I... don't if they're me, do if they're not."

[aeskhyne]

"Well, okay, and we haven't verified that they're you, so. I'll terraform an asteroid," he says. "I even got one in mind."

And he thinks for a few seconds, and then says, "Okay, there. Asteroid time," and vanishes.

[Asteroid's in the same time bubble as your house. Teleporting should be obvious but I can come get you if it's not.]

[instar]

Teleporting is obvious enough that she's there presently.

[aeskhyne]

They are on an asteroid. The asteroid has Earth-standard gravity and is carpeted in soft green grass, but above and around them is a black sky speckled with stars. There are cozy armchairs and couches arranged in a loose circle; Trouble is sitting in an armchair.

"And now I call 'em," he says.

He tells the link that there is a Bell in his world who wants to meet the rest of her.

Celo, being the one currently in Chronicle, brainphones Glass.

[Hey, turns out Ophelia's got a Bell, she wants to meet you all, somebody'll get a Janegem to her in a sec—] Harley appears on the asteroid. [—there, somebody did. Reading between the lines, something's going on in their world that makes Ophelia intensely fucking paranoid about telling anybody anything about them, and if it's enough to make a Joker paranoid, I can only imagine what the Bell's gonna be like.]

Harley plops himself into Trouble's lap. (It is not at all difficult to figure out which one of these people is Ophelia.)

[thaumobabble]

[Thank you.]

Glass appears.

"Hello again, Ophelia. Hi, new Bell, pick a nickname."

[instar]

"Butterfly."

[thaumobabble]

"Butterfly it is. I'm Glass. You look kind of... uh... shellshocked."

[instar]

"You look like me. How do I know that you don't just look like me?"

[thaumobabble]

"...I'm not sure if we've actually had this problem before. We know you're us because I can tell by looking - before that Bar did the same thing - uh, you can tell we're you because we're about to hand you lots and lots of magical power and assume you'll do good Bell things with it?"

[aeskhyne]

"Here's your shot at the genie," Trouble puts in.

[instar]

"What do I have to do?" Butterfly asks Glass.

[thaumobabble]

"This... isn't a trade. This is, you are us, therefore if we just free and clear give you stuff, stuff that we would approve of will follow straightforwardly. ...Uh. Possibly I should mention that one of us is in school to be a therapist. What in the fuck is wrong with your world?"

[aeskhyne]

"So much," says Trouble.

[instar]

"The worst thing."

[thaumobabble]

"That's n- one of us grew up on a planet where literally every human being was brainwashed on a daily basis to adore the brainwasher and the monarch who employed her. She's not shellshocked. Butterfly, what's...?"

[instar]

"Why didn't the brainwasher get her?"

[thaumobabble]

"Except her, yes, I neglected to say; some of us have a template immunity to mental magic - what happened to you?"

[instar]

"Nothing yet. Nothing yet. To me."