this is crazy

[from_scratch]

Cam is watching a new recording of Atriama, tail swishing in the gap in his couch, and doesn't stop to pause the show when he feels a summons go by.

Comments

[from_scratch]

Cam flies over to her. "Hi," he says. "Any chance you'll just surrender? That'd be real nice."

[whole_new_can]

"Surrender in exchange for what? You can't spare me the indignity of having lost."

[from_scratch]

"I mean, if that's the only thing you care about in this exchange then I guess we're not going to get anywhere with the concept of 'surrender'."

[whole_new_can]

"That depends what it is you want. Sovereignty, to be the one everyone else fears and obeys? That is the goal of most of my subordinates, and I always assumed it would be of whoever managed to dethrone me."

[from_scratch]

"No, not especially. I'm more of a well-being-of-the-governed kind of guy."

[whole_new_can]

"If you want to make food and buildings in my territory, I will not interdict that. Hardly a surrender, if well-being is all you're after."

[from_scratch]

"I mean, you'd also have to stop killing people, that's what I'm expecting would be the sticking point."

[whole_new_can]

"Yes. I must feed my Scavenger."

[from_scratch]

"Or you could not do that."

[whole_new_can]

"And be powerless?"

[from_scratch]

"I mean, if we can't work something out you can be powerless and dead because you're too much trouble to keep an eye on. Is that better?"

[whole_new_can]

"Not for you.
I am obeyed because I am feared, and I am feared because I have lasted. Do you imagine my subordinates will follow your orders, or will you fight them one at a time like you did Rei?"

[from_scratch]

"Which one's Rei?"

[whole_new_can]

"I am." The formerly inconvenient brute speaks up.

He kicks a rock at his boss. It flies past her, predictably faster than it ought to be moving, and smashes into the jar of Hatchet Face. Moord Nag's shadow swells back up from nothing, and strikes at Cam even before reaching its former size.

[from_scratch]

Cam blinks.

Then he remakes the Hatchet Face head.

"So we're not going to be coming to any kind of consensus here?" he sighs.

[whole_new_can]

Rei's eyes widen briefly, but if Moord Nag is surprised at Cam's continued existence she doesn't show it. Barely injured and visibly healing is a new one, as far as she and her scavenger have ever seen.

"It seems we won't."

[from_scratch]

"And you have way too many allies for me to just keep you in custody like I did with Bonesaw. Aaaaand if I send you to the Birdcage you'll probably just slaughter everyone in it. Killing people is not my favorite activity but you're not giving me a lot of options."

[whole_new_can]

"I could agree to kill no one unless they are the aggressor, if that is what it takes. And if in the future you decide to kill more people, you can always give them to me instead."

[from_scratch]

"And my reasoning for believing such an agreement would be?"

[whole_new_can]

"A contract is inviolable. I'll forgive the insult once.”

[from_scratch]

And after that she'll, what, fail to kill him again? Whatever. "Can I consult anything other than your say-so for information about your attitude towards contracts?"

[whole_new_can]

"You could ask my minions. I've dealt in cities and brokered alliances and relied on the fact that no party would doubt my word.

That was twice."

[from_scratch]

"Well, if you're not going to forgive me for not already having a complete record of your contract-making history on hand we may have a separate problem."

[whole_new_can]

"The insult was in requiring it."

[from_scratch]

"Yeah, I mostly just have this habit of not taking supervillains' words for things when I have them at metaphorical gunpoint. Can you overlook this character flaw of mine or should I skip the part where I verify your statement?"