Ivan Xav Vorpatril (
middlingalong) wrote in
alicornutopia2014-11-03 07:09 pm
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hell of a party
Ivan must be drunker than he thought he was. He could have sworn he knew his way around Vivienne's parents' house, since she wanted to introduce him last week and showed him the place, but maybe they have a... secret... upstairs... bar? where Vivienne's room is supposed to be? And most certainly was last time he checked? He's never going to find the sweater she sent him up looking for here, anyway. Why is there a secret upstairs bar in Vivienne's parents' house?
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"But still," says Nika.
"Nika, all the things you've heard about happened long before I was born."
Nika scoots closer to Isabella instead. Isabella checks her ponytail half-consciously.
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Grownup Miles sighs.
"'Bad' and 'Cetagandan' are not synonymous. On my word, she's fine," he says.
"Fine," grumbles Little Miles. "But you better not have more weird stuff you're not telling me."
...ulp.
"You do!" says Little Miles, pointing accusingly at his alt. "You do have more weird stuff! Tell me all the weird stuff right now!"
Grownup Miles winces.
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"Can you be mature about the weird stuff?" Linya asks. "It's pretty weird."
"Stop keeping secrets!"
"Nika."
"...I'll try."
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"Try'n stop me," says Little Miles.
"No shrieking or I just won't tell you the rest of the things."
"...No shrieking," agrees Little Miles, very grudgingly.
"All right," says Grownup Miles. He glances over at the Linya-cluster to see if Nika's grownups verify her as ready to hear weird things.
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"...Alien," corrects Big Ivan. "Well, half-alien."
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"Probably not, no," says Grownup Miles. "You're just saying that because you don't get to yell about it."
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"...that's cool actually," says Nika. "That's why you can read minds?"
"Yes."
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"The magic kind of dwarf," Nika clarifies.
"Yes."
"That's also pretty cool."
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"We're getting there," Grownup Miles says wearily.
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"Lalita's the one with the magic blood," Grownup Miles adds helpfully.
"Good for him," says Little Miles, although he does appear to find this information genuinely mollifying. "What else?"
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"Grownup Miles is married, too," says Big Ivan, when no one else jumps on the revelation.
"But you aren't, right?" asks Tiny Ivan. "It's weird enough that you kiss girls."
"I am not married."
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...Miles cracks up.
"No," he says between giggles. "Not Mark."
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"Eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwww. That's almost as bad."
"But not actually as bad," says grownup Miles.
"Well. I guess not. She's not your sister. She's Cetagandan."
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"I'm a Cetagandan you. I can check just how not-related we are if you want to see. And we didn't know anything about alts or other worlds until today, so we couldn't really take it into account."
"But you're a me and he's a my brother."
"Nika, you're adopted anyway."
"But he's my BROTHER."
"Too bad."
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"I'm married to her anyway," says Grownup Miles.
"Well... well stop!"
"Just like I should stop being twenty-five? I'll get right on that," he says, rolling his eyes.
"Get a divorce."
"I actually pretended to do that once, to save her from some people who wanted to kill me," says Miles. "They said they'd let her go if she got a divorce and promised not to rescue me. But it wasn't legally binding because Da wasn't there, and anyway we got rescued by other people before I could finish."
Little Miles is almost distracted by the impressiveness of this story.
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"Don't wanna," says Grownup Miles.
Little Miles is stumped by this unassailable argument.
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"Yes. I do."
Nika seems to find that argument pretty unassailable.
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"Are there any left?"
"Can't think of any," says Miles honestly. He feels that the exact occupation of Stalas, Mark, and Lalita upstairs is something his five-year-old self still wouldn't want to know even adjusting for his demand to be told all the things he won't like hearing. (And last Miles saw them, they appeared to be having a ticklefight anyway.)
"Then I guess I'm done yelling about them," says Little Miles. "Even though I didn't hardly."
"And now," says Grownup Miles, "you can go back to yelling at me about Strat-O." He makes a move.
Little Miles giggles. "Deal!"
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"Well, yes, sort of," acknowledges Linya. "But -"
"I know, I know, I'm adopted. But who'm I going to marry?"
"You could skip it if you wanted, I imagine. Or find somebody else and then have to explain to a three-year-old you that it's okay."
Nika snorts.
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SPOILERS FOR EFFULGENCE: SUPERLUMINAL FOLLOW
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