planetary

[dark_light]

Over the next week, Isabella gets the alethiometer to tell her that the planets they looked at don't contain microorganisms that know what to do with a human body (although the one with the giant bugs has some multicellular parasites that might be able to make do with the foreign macro-scale features of a human body if they got the chance). "The present", it includes in one of its answer phrasings, which is kind of worrying. But Adarin makes enough progress with his scry in little enough time that it's worth the double-check.

Isabella also hires ticket-takers, gives them little pots of ink to verify the authenticity of the passes she handed out, and opens the Los Angeles - New York route for the employees of her three companies of choice and anyone who shells out a cool fifteen thousand dollars per round trip (ten K for a one-way). This is steep, but it's within an order of magnitude of what people sometimes pay for short-notice first-class cross-country flights - with less novelty and more hassle. Albeit she doesn't supply inflight meals. She expects to have to raise the price when more people hear about it in response to volume and then be able to drop it again.

By the time the thing has been open for a few days she's fired and replaced one ticket-taker and the others have settled into a routine that she's willing to try out leaving unsupervised for awhile.

If Adarin's up for some up close and personal planet shopping and his results suggest it'll go well, anyway.

Comments

[prodigal_miser]

"It will -" (Giggle, snicker.) "go down in the history books as my title. My eternal shame, cats will never -" (Snicker.) "never be able to respect anyone that even looks like me, they'll be so disgusted."

[dark_light]

"Wherever you go cats will hiss at you. They will privately approve of the handful brave enough to offer violence! And none of it can ever accumulate to the point of making up for what you did, you cat-nonhelping evildoer."

[prodigal_miser]

"Just as I so rightly deserve," he says, then he tries to say something else -

- But, no, he can't. Too much laughter.

[dark_light]

Mad cackling as they pull into view of the lovely island of NNSARXPHAGLURVVRTW.

[prodigal_miser]

It takes him a while, but eventually he recovers, still giggling a little. "Oh look, here we are. To the island of unpronounceable."

[dark_light]

"Everything in this language is unpronounceable, some of it more than other things... lemme know if you spot one of Juniper's friends, 'kay?"

[prodigal_miser]

"Yeah, I will. We seriously need to teach them English or something, though. I feel like I'm torturing my throat when I try to talk to them."

He goes on the look out for robots!

[dark_light]

"Yeah, but it sounds like a kind of major project to program an entire language in for them and I'm not sure if it gets any easier if they only have to understand it without having to speak it."

That could be a robot over there!

[prodigal_miser]

"Well it's a non-mana based project, at least. So I'll have something to do while I wait for my metaphorical batteries to recharge between feats of fantastic magical prowess. Also, I think I see a robot." He points to it.

[dark_light]

Isabella steers toward the robot. It is indeed a robot. It doesn't react to them.

"Hey, robot," she says. "You still work?"

"THIS UNIT IS OPERATIONAL" says the robot.

"I'm gonna designate you Rosie, okay?"

"YES"

"Will you show us the way to the command center?"

"YES"

Rosie starts trundling along an overgrown path, rolling effectively over medium-sized obstacles.

[prodigal_miser]

Adarin snickers. "I vote that it becomes a naming scheme that we name them all after plants. Pretty plants."

[dark_light]

"That's the plan! Plant robot army. Next one I have reason to name gets 'Wisteria'." She flies after Rosie. Rosie is not all that fast.

[prodigal_miser]

"I love you," he laughs.

[dark_light]

"I love you too."

Rosie leads them to what appears to be an entrance to an underground facility.

"Is this locked?" Isabella asks it.

"YES"

"Is it trapped or attached to an alarm system?"

"NO"

English again. "Okay. So I guess we get to finesse the lock with magic. I'll try to come up with a verse for it but if I don't get anywhere you can probably manage, or we can just note where this is for our next visit."

[prodigal_miser]

"I can probably manage! But you get to go first, I am the walking battery. Slowly charging myself up," he says dryly.

[dark_light]

"Right. Hmmm. I don't think the only unlocking spell I have memorized will work on anything high-tech, let alone high-tech and also alien..." Isabella gets to composing. (Rosie has no comment.)

Eventually Isabella puts her hand on the door and says:

"Lock from centuries ago,
Let the door ajar,
Stand aside and open wide,
Unlock, release, unbar."

There is a grinding noise. The door unlatches and swings free - from hinges at the top, like a cat door, not from the side.

[prodigal_miser]

Adarin grins. "Your magic's so much more theatrical than mine, it's so delightful."

He peers inside! Is there anything possibly dangerous? Does he need to get defensive of Isabella and put up a shield?

[dark_light]

There's another robot! It does not bother them.

"I'm designating you Wisteria," Isabella tells this one, since Rosie hasn't followed them in.

"UNDERSTOOD" says Wisteria.

"Show us where the commands to the robots get issued."

"THIS IS NOT AUTHORIZED" says Wisteria.

"Okay... Adarin, what do you think, field-promotion or is there still a reason that might be a bad idea?"

[prodigal_miser]

He considers, then says, "We should check intelligence and possible sentience levels first, if you don't mind."

Adarin switches languages, then just asks bluntly, "Wisteria, are you sentient?"

[dark_light]

"REPHRASE INQUIRY FOR LANGUAGE PROCESSOR" suggests Wisteria.

[prodigal_miser]

"Do you have intelligence or conscious thoughts?"

[dark_light]

"UNITS ARE PROGRAMMED TO RESPOND DYNAMICALLY TO NOVEL INPUT FOR CORRECT DECISION-MAKING ON BEHALF OF NOBLE NNSARXPH"

[prodigal_miser]

Head-tilt. Okay, that's... Kinda intelligence? Sort of? "Do you have opinions on things? If something broke you, would you feel anything about it?"

[dark_light]

"UNITS ARE PROGRAMMED TO SELF-SACRIFICE FOR STRATEGIC OBJECTIVES OR TO ENABLE THE FIELD MAINTENANCE OF OTHER UNITS - UNDER OTHER CIRCUMSTANCES PRESERVATION OF UNITS IS WORTHWHILE"

[prodigal_miser]

Well that kind of bothers him, a little. He understands strategically why it would be a thing that's programmed, but it bugs him to make something that will kill itself if necessary. Responsibility to things that you create, and all.

"Do you have preferences about things? Is there something you prefer doing over other things?"