delta v over delta t when there is no t

[ertia]

In a bar, there is a girl.

She looks like she has saved up all of her decadent and slothful impulses for a solid decade and is indulging them all at once. She is sprawled on a couch with a book she's only half-reading, and an ice cream sundae, and smiiiiiiling.

Comments

[first_and_final]

"...Not that sad, I don't think," he says after a moment of internal consultation. "Moderately, tolerably sad. Honestly I'd be more frustrated that we got that close to you being able to cheat almost as hard as I can at sorcery and then this weird awkward property of vampirism got in the way. Like, that's terrible."

[ertia]

"Because, like... when I decided to be a sorceress I basically decided I was limiting my social life to my parents and like... business contacts. I like you, and everything, and there's Milliways to make it less of a tradeoff to have other uses of my time, but I hadn't swung all the way into actually thinking about it yet."

[first_and_final]

"Well, it's not like you don't have time to think it over," says Milan.

[ertia]

"I'm not sure I do, how long is Addy available?"

[taste_tester]

"Till I meet someone more interesting you in the bar. But he could turn you too. Doesn't look like he's the least bit inclined to go all newborny and accidentally kill you."

[first_and_final]

"Yeah, even if I were in any way uncertain about my ability to peaceably bite you, I didn't get the impression that literal biting was actually required? So Addy is totally not necessary to this process."

[taste_tester]

"Just have to introduce venom into the system."

[ertia]

"This is very much a, like, quaternary concern, but will I have a scar like that?"

[taste_tester]

"No. Well, probably not. You have fewer weird things going on than he does and it's not normal."

[first_and_final]

"I'm as certain as it gets that the scar is the curse's fault," says Milan. "The curse has strong opinions about scars. It made me inherit some of my dad's."

[ertia]

"Well, they're all gone now." Pause. "What is it like?"

[first_and_final]

"...I'm not sure... how useful a description I can give? It's like having a crush on you, while being a vampire." He waves at his intricately dancing streams of water. "Witness the expanded attentional capacity of vampires."

[ertia]

...Kithabel looks at the expanded attentional capacity of vampires.

"Did you notice it before you found me or only after?"

[first_and_final]

"Only after. In retrospect there might've been something beforehand but when I looked at you is when it became extremely noticeable."

[ertia]

"Is this starting from scratch or did you previously have a normal nonmagical crush on me?"

[first_and_final]

"...I don't think I did? Humans do not have perfect memories, but I definitely don't remember ever noticing having a crush on you so if I did it was a pretty subtle one."

[ertia]

"If I go ahead and turn," she says, "then what?"

[first_and_final]

"Then... I don't know?" he says. "What do you mean?"

[ertia]

"Like, does this change any other plans, particularly, do we spend ages in Milliways being," she gestures at Addy, "gooey about it, what happens."

[first_and_final]

He considers this.

"...I suspect that there would be significant time spent in Milliways being gooey about it," he says. "I'm not sure about other plans. The basic trajectory of our lives doesn't seem like it would have to shift much if instead of going to Milliways to sleep we went to Milliways to indulge in magical vampire romance. Except I guess I would be strongly motivated to keep living in your world, or ask you to move to mine, after I go home and overthrow the gods. ...And if I go home and fail to overthrow the gods you might be very sad so it would be a good idea to wait until you can resurrect the dead to try that, but that was already going to be a good idea purely on practical grounds..."

[ertia]

"...Will your world let me get you back if it kills you or will it just... keep you? I have no idea how interdimensional resurrection works. Maybe we should test that first, go home until I'm resurrection-capable and then get somebody dead from your world."

[first_and_final]

"Sure. I have a handy grandfather," he snorts.

[ertia]

"This is potentially years off. Maybe less given one or the other method of cheating on sleeping. I do not want to be sad forever if your world kills you and won't let you go."

[first_and_final]

"...I think even if we didn't manage to resurrect my grandfather I'd still want to go home and overthrow the gods eventually, although I'd certainly prefer to have the reassurance first," he says. "So unfortunately you might be better off waiting, if you're very sure you don't want to take the risk."

[ertia]

"Which will give me more time to contemplate the possibility of the squishy feelings and see what I think of it."